Monday, 9 May 2011
Anyone for seventh?
Blackpool are a beach ball. Colourful, bouncy, lightweight, fun.
So what are Spurs? Spurs are something that can't even puncture a fucking beach ball. Which makes us something blunt, or floppy, I guess - or just plain useless.
And this match report? It's Dennis Wise - short and angry.
We were lucky to get a point. They had the better chances, while we relied on Jermain Defoe doing one of his casual and all-too-rare 'Oh yeah, I remember, I can drill it in the corner from 25 yards with minimum backlift and maximum power' things.
Apart from that, fuck all.
Earlier, when Everton's second goal went in and the fourth pint slipped down, we were all set for quite the game and quite the day. We could have set ourselves up to head to Eastlands knowing a win would put us one point behind Man City who remain, frankly, shit.
Instead we carried along on our path of relentless and intensely frustrating mediocrity. Actually, mediocrity's too generous; nine points from nine games, when seven of those opponents are virtually the seven worst teams in the league, well that's miserable form.
A draw was a mean little result. I would probably have been happier if they'd have bagged all three points and made themselves something like safe - although I did feel a little less benevolent towards them when I saw Charlie Adam's 'tackle' on Gareth Bale.
Look, it's astonishingly kind of Arsenal and West Ham to try and lift our spirits most weeks with a series of undeniably chucklesome results, but the truth is that the last third of this season has been thoroughly depressing.
And what must the mood be within the squad? Okay, we've fucked up our chances of a Champions League finish, and now look certain to slip to sixth, but a run of comfortable wins and confident performances would surely have gone some way to suggesting that Spurs are worth sticking with - and that next season holds some promise.
As it is, Modric (and whoever else) will go into the summer break despondent not just at a lack of achievement but at a lack of spark, ambition, quality or hope. So, when the league champions and European Cup finalists come calling...
This season's had some pretty high highs, but it's ending on a very low low - and results like this could cost us more than points.