Friday, 10 December 2010


Right, so, Chelsea on Sunday.

The media's being hugely annoying, talking up our chances, Spurs to put another nail in Chelsea's coffin, etc. Utter nonsense, obviously.

We're doing okay in the league and, sure, we've made a decent fist of our first (by which I mean last) Champions League campaign. But, with one or two exceptions, we're not playing that well, are we?

Plus, look at the team:

Gomes - Pulls off the odd decent save, seems to be acquiring the same baffling cult status as Pav, but still a liability and surely the most cowardly 'keeper ever to pull on a pair of gloves.

Hutton - Nah, not really quality, is he? Plus, looks a bit like a mental patient.

Gallas - Old, fragile, unsavoury past.

Bassong - Literally our sixth choice centre back. Decent enough, but any team playing its sixth choice centre back would be weakened. And would have too many crippled centre backs.

Assou-Ekotto - Can look remarkably composed on the ball. But that could be largely down to the fact that he doesn't give a fuck.

Lennon - Shows flashes, but generally having an average season.

Palacious - Nope, not good enough

Modric - Genius, fair enough. Looks like an ugly 15 year old girl. But, yeah, genius.

Bale - Ditto. Only change '15' for '22' and 'girl' for 'bloke'. But, yeah, genius.

All Our Forwards - They're just sort of fine. Apart from Keane, who's a bit worse than that. Defoe's a good goal scorer (penalties aside), but not an actual centre forward. Crouch is a trier, but not an actual human being, possibly. Pav will capable of scoring spectacular goals and looking like the real deal, but there's a definite Brigadoon quality to his brilliance

So, doomed.

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